I'm afraid to tell people
Truthfully, I've been scared. Might shit my pants scared. My business will plummet to the ground and I will have lost every single thing I’ve worked so hard to build, scared.
Oh hi! I’m Stef, the Introverted Witch. Have we met yet? If not, welcome! My mind likes to doom-play scenarios at times. Just me?
I’ve been scared of rejection; of alienation; and absolutely scared shitless of losing support from a community I’ve been pouring my heart into for years. A community I love.
But… is community even a community if it’s without acceptance?
I’ve realized that I cannot keep guiding the community into authenticity, while not openly sharing who I am. Not that I have been a fraud - in fact it clearly states on my bio, on my website, that I am a Green Witch; but I have selectively chosen what to share about what I love, how I move through life, and what I want to offer that is unique to me.
I am a Witch. Here it is!
There's still much stigma around the word ‘Witch’. I can hear the confusion, curiosity, and underlying fear when I claim that title in certain spaces I am in. I hear it from children; and I see it in physical expressions from adults. I mean, I don't blame them one bit because if you google: 'What is a witch?', the first thing that pops up is a definition portraying us as evil and 'directed at harming or inflicting misfortune in others’.
We are portrayed as either being: Charming in order to lure people into temptations; mean or ugly {the Hag}; or to allegedly invoke supernatural powers to control people.
"We are actually pretty much the same as everyone - except we see situations with a dimensional lens that helps us to understand the world on a deeper level. (...) We are seers of truths and givers of wisdom, and nurturers of Earth and those who inhabit it. We are high-vibe peeps who want to make the world a better place - not cauldron-stirring trouble makers like the infamous Sanderson sisters." - In Style article by Lisa Stardust
Most recently, during a Forest School program I was working for, I heard my son shout: "Mom, tell him I'm not lying and that you're a real live Witch." My children know what this identity means. They know that it's not what is portrayed on TV, in the media, and sometimes even on the web. But there are still so many people who don't. There's still a disconnect from what it actually represents in real life. I mean, I would love to be able to fly on a broom and make something appear, but alas, I haven’t figured that one out yet. It took me over a decade of contemplation, of educating myself, of intentional internal work, and of listening to my body & soul and how it felt when I assigned it this identity. Especially because I was afraid and self conscious of that New Age trend becoming more and more mainstream. At one point, I started wondering if it was authentic or not for me. But I know now that identifying as a Witch feels absolutely true for me. I own it and I live it.
At times it might look mainstream, and at other times you wouldn't even know. I’m just walking the streets of Ottawa, living, doing my groceries, checking out library books, biting my nails, taking care of my children, going for a swim, cuddling my cats, and occasionally talking to plants & trees.
I mean: I look, smell & talk like I'm your regular gal next door, and that’s because I am.
Yet, I’ve learned to listen to my intuition & the messages I get from my guides & ancestors. I’ve learned to harvest, make & heal alongside the one I worship: Mother Nature. And I’ve shared my intuitive gifts with those I’ve felt I could trust.
So what does identifying as a Witch mean to me?
I use the power of thoughts & intentions, for good, on a regular basis. I journal A LOT and I pull cards to receive the intuitive messages that aren't always so clear in my mind. I reach for essential oils because they are the healing essences of the plants. Ask a biochemist! I use crystals because they are made from the earth you walk on everyday, and have the best energetic properties that come from their make-up. I use colored candles because colors help shift and give you insights on your moods. Working with them can change your energy. I follow the Moon cycles because whether you believe in it or not, you are affected by it mentally, physically & emotionally - it's inclusive like that. I walk barefoot because there are so many scientific studies that prove how earthing can help your immune system, your gut, provide calm, help with stress management, and replenish you with energy.
The thing about Witches is that they are all around you, living their lives just like you & I. They serve you in restaurants, they work the corporate job, they teach your children, they heal your wounds, and some even attend your church. Movies are fun; but it's not reality.
Last September 2022 I launched a pilot program called "Woodland Wizarding School" where it was my first, small, step into sharing what being a Witch means to me, and sharing it with our younger generation. I had the absolute best time brewing foods & beverages on the fire with intention settings; writing in our grimoires together; fostering potion & spell making; sharing about the moon; learning a song that honors the elements; and treating Mother Nature as our ultimate guide. And I’ve made a personal promise to myself that I would do more of that.
I'm cooking up something for adults. Something that truly & authentically aligns with this part of me. I'm not quite ready to share what it is, but I can tell you that I'm ready to practice what I preach and fully show up as myself.
As I entered a new season around the sun in July, I made a commitment to myself to believe in me so much that my belief & confidence trumps my fear of rejection and alienation. And truthfully, nothing has ever felt so right.
Thank you for being here, magickal human!
I hope you stay, subscribe, and connect with me here as I share more musings of The Introverted Witch every Thursday during noon hour.
Whether you’ve used the Witch or Wizard identifier before, currently, or might be wondering if that’s you, know that you have a place here. Heck, you have a place everywhere! But here, I wholeheartedly welcome you into our space to share your story or perhaps say hi.
Welcome to the Introverted Witch blog. I AM Introverted, AND I love nothing more than to connect with others. Comment below! Let’s chat!
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Love that you shared this Stef! 🙏🏻 proud of you!